Tuesday, May 31, 2011

I wept for the little boy that used to play here....

This evening I went for a little walk out in the woods to visit the small trillium patch that grows nearby. The plants were still there, but the blooms were dried up. I was too late. They had gone by. This is the first time that I remember ever having missed seeing the trilliums in bloom since I was a child. It made me a bit sad and thoughtful. 

I took a few moments to look around at my surroundings.  I realized that amongst the rocks where I was standing, was my oldest son's "cabin". This spot under the large fir trees and amongst the moss covered rocks was his special spot when he was age 4 till about age 10 or so.

I stood there in that spot and wept for the little boy that used to play there. As I stood there, for a brief moment I felt his little hand in mine once again. He looked up at me and called me "Mommy".  He told me all about his great adventures in the land of make-believe. I miss that little boy and his little brother, too.

Both my sons are alive and well today. They are both fine young men of whom I am very proud. I am pleased to call them my sons and so thankful to call them each "friend" as well. Being a mother, is a wonderful experience. However, having grown sons is very different from having young sons. So much so, that they seem as though they are entirely different people. I am truly blessed to have such fine sons and I would not trade the men they have become for all the world, but I would give all I own to have those little boys back for just one more day (honestly, I would), the time went by far too fast. 

So Momma with little ones at home, treasure this day you have with your children. I know you are tired, I know how much you would love just 5 minutes alone to think, time to yourself... the time will come all too soon when they are grown... hug them now, listen to their little stories, and as you hold their little hand in yours...give it a little squeeze for me.


  1. I enjoyed reading this even though I shed a few tears. I have thoroughly enjoyed every *season* so far in raising my children, but it is so bittersweet to see them pass over into a new season. I love to see the boys turning into men, but at the same time I miss the little boys who came running to me with dandelions “just for me”. Countless times over this past school year I have been so thankful that while I am teaching Biology or Geometry I am also teaching phonics and the lifecycle of a butterfly to such an eager little audience. I never would have planned my family to be so spaced apart, but God knew all along that I would need little girls bringing me dandelions at the same time that my boys would be spinning out in pick-ups and going off to jobs. Thank you for posting this and for allowing me to take a few minutes today to think about days gone by.

  2. This was a great encouragement to me! Thanks so much for this reminder!

  3. This gets to the heart of the matter doesn't it—take time to pause and take it in. I can appreciate the value here, because God has taught me so much about "living in the moment" with my little one.

  4. Thank you so much ladies for your kind words. :) :)